Taking Charge

Yesterday I worked with a client who had some furniture given to her by her Mom many years ago. She didn't like these artifacts. But she couldn't go along with the idea of letting these pieces go. When she talked about it she got irritated and looked away. She seemed to shrink and look discouraged.

I said, "Our parents have a very powerful influence in our lives. They raised us and on some level we see them as necessary for our survival, even long after we move out on our own. We don't want to see that because we want to feel and think we are independent. But we see the evidence here. You don't like the furniture. But you feel the resistance. Would you buy it today if we were out shopping at Ikea?"

She said, "No, not at all."

I said, "But still there's a part of you that doesn't want to let them go."

She said, "I know, it's crazy. I don't know what to do."

I said, "The best thing you can do it take over the reigns of your life. It's your turn. Your mom's not here to do it anymore. You get to do it now. You're the decision maker. Your life benefits in a huge way when you decide. You're in charge. What would you like to do?"

She said in a strong voice, "I want this furniture out of here!"

She didn't want to deal with trying to sell it on Craigslist. We took the three pieces and put them in the alleyway. She had the strength in her that I see in all of my clients when they begin making decisions for themselves.