"My thing has always been to judge people who have clutter as having cluttered thought processes too. I see now that that is too simple an explanation. Perhaps a little more compassion on my part is needed."
It's easy and addicting to judge ourselves and others in a difficult situation. I think we judge to make the other person or ourselves feel badly, so that a positive change will occur. But I think it sets us on fire. Pointing out faults makes everyone feel lousy.
Compassion is the key. I figure anyone with clutter is hurting in someway and they need tenderness. They are in a difficult situation because of some physical or emotional pain within themselves. Our judgments add to the pain.
It helps to imagine the judgment arising in us as a fist about to strike the other person or ourselves. This makes sense since judgments hurt the striker and strikee.
Not striking gives us the space to think,"How can I help? What can I do to help this person or myself? What can I do to help them or myself think more clearly? What do they/I need right now?"
Kindness is an elixir. It immediately begins to reduce the turmoil. Solutions come out of compassion.