Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Want To

I was helping my client clutter bust her files. She was finding a lot of papers that involved some kind of activity that she wanted to do.

"Making bath salts, I want to do that." "Oh, this is about a class where they teach you how to dance, I want to do that." "This has important information, I want to read it." She wanted to keep these papers and put them back in the file.

I pointed out that earlier on in our conversation she said that she was stressed because her plate was full. She complained that she was so busy, she had no personal down town. At the same time, she had a large amount of "Want tos."

Our minds can easily think of more things than we can actually do. It takes seconds to think of something, but actual hours of doing. Our mind gets frustrated that we can't do it all. I also think we sometimes imagine we want to do new things as a distraction from being overwhelmed, which adds fuel to the fire.

She could relate to this and agreed to let go of some of the want tos. But then she came across a flyer for a course on learning to help trauma victims. I think she was relating unconsciously to this one.

I said, "You want to do it, but will you actually sign up, pay for the course, show up for the classes, and find the time in your full days to help trauma victims?"

She let out a sigh and said, "Right now I've got enough that I'm doing." She sounded grounded and whole.

......

I'm in Los Angeles for the next few weeks. If you'd like to set up a clutter busting session with me while I'm town, email me at brooks@clutterbusting.com

5 comments:

A. said...

thanks for sharing your thoughts, your posts have been truly helpful to me quite a few times by giving me a new perspective on some of the issues I have been struggling with over the last year or so.

Ceci said...

I can very much relate to this at the moment.."we sometimes imagine we want to do new things as a distraction from being overwhelmed". I have been finding it hard to fit in all my interests lately; yet even so I made the rash decision over the weekend to bid on a large lot of embroidery skeins which I paid $10 for. In terms of price they were a bargain, being worth over $60, but I know I won't have time to use most of them...which makes them a not such a bargain after all.

I guess that buying stuff is often a displacement reaction to being overwhelmed, just an escape from whatever is bothering us. But it just makes things worse.

Brooks_Palmer said...

A., I'm glad the posts have been helpful!

Ceci, at least you realized what was happening. I'd treat the discovery as a red flag. Sometimes we can't help but "fall" for clutter, but we can be kind to ourselves afterwards and clean up the mess.

Jilly said...

Quite a lot of my "want tos" that I had accumulated over the years eventually turned into "maybe" clutter! Not anymore.

Brooks_Palmer said...

I like your motivation!