My partner clutter busted the hat area of our home. She asked me about two baseball caps and I easily said I liked them. But then she asked me if I liked a hat her dad had given me a few weeks ago. I immediately said, "No." I surprised myself. A few thoughts passed through my head, "I should keep this hat because it was a gift from her dad." "Maybe I should give it another thought."
But it was clear from the simplicity and honesty of the, "No" that this hat had no place in my life. I didn't love it. It was tan and I don't like tan hats. Plus I hadn't worn the hat since I received it as a gift. So we donated the hat.
When we hang on to items that we don't care for, that are not a living, actual part of our life, we create entropy in our living space. Things that don't get used create a dullness in the space. They create a stagnant feeling that extends through the home, spoiling the things that we love and use.
Just because something was a gift doesn't create an exception to the rule. Our first responsibility is to creating a peaceful space for ourselves. Go with the feeling of certainty. Trust your gut reaction.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
"Hat area" made me laugh. But hats should have an area! Great reminder to trust our first instinct.
When I first started reading this I thought, He can't get rid of that! Her DAD gave it to him! But by the time I got to the end of the post, I was with you 100%. I think the part that made me realize that it's OK to donate the hat was when you pointed out that it was "not a living, actual part of our life". Her dad, of course, is a part of your life, not the hat. I've got over a year of clutter busting under my belt, so I'm sitting here kind of surprised that I had that reaction, like NO! You can't DO that! It will hurt her feelings, and her dad's feelings! I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed lately, and the clutter has been creeping back in. I've been telling myself it's because of the new baby, but I think I have to revisit that last chapter of my trusty red clutter busting book! Thanks for this post!
Lisa, the reactions to hold on to things are going to happen. The trick is to notice them as red flags that the reactions are helpful pointers that something is clutter.
So glad you are feeling well enough to post twice within two days! Glad to read new posts but don't push yourself beyond your current energy/health limits. We will still be here when you are fully recovered.
I'm a recent arrival to your blog--found you shortly before your surgery. While waiting & hoping for your return I've been reading your archives. They are always helpful because your advice is so focused. Many organizing advisers can help with the nuts and bolts (keep records for XYZ years, donate excess household goods to ABC organizations, etc.); far fewer can help us recognize our internal, idiosyncratic indicators that clearly distinguish between "keep" and "don't keep" items--which is the most fundamental part of decluttering! The rest is just mechanics (well, except for acquiring the ability to accomplish "good enough" instead of "perfect" redistribution of our unwanted stuff).
Thanks for your support, Jean!
I like bringing it back to the simple basics, "Do you love and use this thing, and if not, can you let it go?"
Just checked in to your blog. So glad you're back!
Thanks, Paula Marie
Post a Comment