Listening

A blog reader emailed me that she was planning on doing some decluttering but was distracted from doing so by something that came up and needed her attention at that moment. Later in the day she said that she, "Felt guilty that I 'accomplished nothing' today, especially with regard to decluttering. I know this is 'crazy, negative self-talk', but it is one that I am very familiar with. Any advise on how to 'let go' of such talk?"

I wrote her back saying that there is nothing wrong with negative self-talk. It is often a part of us that feels neglected. A part of her really wanted to declutter on that day and her feeling guilty was a way for her to express those emotions. Rather than erase the self-talk, it could help to acknowledge those feelings as if she were openly and patiently listening to a child.

Sometimes we just need to feel heard. There's healing in the listening. It's something we can kindly do for ourselves. We are complicated creatures and the more compassion we can have for ourselves the better.

If you've read my blogs here before, you know that I've said it's not a good idea to beat yourself up with negative self-talk. But beating yourself up also doesn't cure you of negative self-talk.

The only way to cure yourself of anything is to first accept it, then listen to what it has to say.