Today’s client started out by saying, “I want the best for
myself.” She wanted to remove anything from her life that didn’t make her feel
good about herself.
We began by doing a clutter bust of her clothes. She came
across a pair of pants in which the elastic had completely worn out. She
frowned, and her voice got tight. She unhappily said she should hang on the
pants because they still fit her.
I pointed out how uncomfortable she sounded. I imitated her
voice. I said keeping those pants would not give her what she wanted, “the best
for herself.” She was surprised she didn’t initially notice her reaction. She
let the pants go.
Then we came across another pair of pants that were torn,
worn out, and didn’t fit her. She got that same frown and tight voice again and
she considered keeping those pants. Again I echoed back her reaction to her,
and reminded her of her desire to treat herself well. Again, she was surprised,
and let those pants go.
She came across another pair. She got that same shut down
reaction. She said she didn’t wear the pants, but confessed a deep part of her wanted to
keep the pants in case she lost everything because at least she would have these
pants. I repeated this back to her and she laughed. She let the pants go.
In every case that my client got struck, she went into a
trance. She was caught up in the emotional involvement of what she feeling and shut down. She wasn’t noticing her
uncomfortableness. That often happens when clients come across something that
is emotionally loaded and buried. They are protecting themselves from feelings
that for some reason are overwhelming and uncomfortable.
This is why we often don’t see the clutter in our lives. We go into a trance.
I’m pointing this out to encourage you to take the time to
check in with yourself while clutter busting. If you can, notice any feelings
of hesitation, tiredness, or discomfort during the clutter bust. As you ask
about a particular thing, person, or activity in your life, “Do I like and use
this, or can I let it go?” be aware of how you are feeling. Use your clutter radar to
detect any tensions, or overthinking that might arise. Or if you feel overwhelmed and want to
move on to something else. Do the best you can to stay open to seinge these red flags.
At first it might be like trying to see something through a
fog, but the more you practice this, the more aware you become.